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Memorial created 10-9-2008 by
Sheri Morell
Christopher Allen Morell
January 27 2006 - January 11 2008

Momma's little Angel

This online memorial was created in loving memory of Christopher Morell, whose life story is told throughout this memorial website. Please sign Christopher's guest book and let us know you came to visit. We will remember Christopher forever.

When I got pregnant with Christopher it was a big suprise to us. John and I had not even been married two months when we found out I was pregnant. I had Christopher on January 27, 2006. He weighedá6lbs 9oz's and was 19 inches long. He was such aá sweet baby! áHaving Christopher brought more happiness into my life then I had ever known before. He was such a good baby. Happy all the time and loved to be around people. He was a little social butterfly like his daddy! The only time he ever cried was if he was over tired or just not feeling good! He slept through the night most of the time and was on a great schedule. Every nightáI would lay him down around 7pm after reading a book (He loved to read) and would sleep until about 6:15 every morning. He never cried when I put him to bed. There are so many nights that I would just listen to him talk and play until he fell asleep. He was so sweet. He spent the days during the week at his grandparents house while I worked and he loved it. He used get to ride on the lawn mower with Grandpa and when the weather was good they would take him to the lake. He loved the water! His favorite pass time was to watch Thomas the train. I think he was obsessed! He was pretty small for his age and we went through a lot of doctors because they were determined to find something wrong with him because he was so little. He was a happy healthy little boy but they just didn't want to listen to me. He ate great and was just very active.

This past Christmas we really went all out for Christopher and he had a wonderful time. He got all kinds of thomas the train toys, clothes, movies, and even a child size table and chairs. He got to meet his aunt, uncle, and cousins for the first time over Christmas and he loved having them here. He loved to play with kids and he played so well with them.

The week before he died, he started having night terros and just seemed to want his mommy alot. Especially in the middle of night. I would have to get up with him 2 or 3 times a night because he just seemed so scared. All he wanted was for me to hold him. He was sleeping so little that he would fall asleep on the couch before dinner would be ready. I kept trying to figure out what was going on with him. Never would I have imagined that we would lose him. January 10th, he was so fussy throughout the night that finally about 4am I brought him into my bed. I normally wouldn't do that but now I am glad I did. He just laid there quietly while I tried to continue to rest my eyes. Everytime I would look over at him to make sure he was ok, he would just be looking at me and give me a cute smile. On the 11th I dropped him off at my moms around 6:30 and told him I loved him. That would be last time I saw him before the accident. That afternoon, Him and Grandpa went out to feed the birds. My mom had found some old bread and she sent them out so she could straighten up the house. My stepdad, turned his head for only a quick second and Christopher went running the opposite direction. The person driving the pick up tried to swerve but couldn't avoid hitting him.

I was at work when I received the call and I almost collapsed. John had told me to clock out that he was coming to pick me up. At first he wasn't going to tell me over the phone but I needed to know. We got to Stonecrest Medical Center and was on a ventilator. We were able to go back and see him before they life flighted him to Vanderbilt Hospital. It didn't look good. I felt like I was in a dream that I was going to wake up from any moment. When we arrived to Vanderbilt they immediately took us back to a conference room. The whole family was there including our Pastor. When the doctor came in they explained that Christopher's heart had stopped during the flight over and they were not able to revive him. I couldn't believe what I was hearing. I just fell apart. They allowed John and I back to see him and they allowed me to hold him. I didn't went to let him go. I just kept asking how was I suppose to give him up! I just couldn't understand why God had taken my sweet baby away from me.

The next few days after that I was in a complete state of shock! I couldn't cry or show any emotion, I was just completely blank. The funeral was really nice. It was so packed in the funeral home that people were having to stand in the back. Pastor Bobby told me that he had never done a funeral that large. My brother Skip sang I can only Imagine during the service and I started to loose it. I just have not been able to figure out how I am suppose to go on without my sweet baby. He was my only child and the light of my life. Just 16 days after we lost Christopher we celebrated what would have been his 2nd birthday

á

Christopher, you will forever be in my heart. I will love you always!!!!!!!!!!

á

 

If tears could build a stairway,
And memories were a lane,
I would walk up to heaven
And bring you back again.

No farewell words were spoken,
No time to say goodbye,
You were gone before I knew it
And God only knows why.

My heart still aches in sadness,
And secret tears still flow,
What it meant to lose you,
No one will ever know.

Since you'll never be forgotten
We pledge to you today
A hallowed place within our hearts
Is where you'll always stay

Love Mom and Dad
Author Unknowná

á

 

What is Normal after your child dies?

Normal is having tears waiting behind every smile when you realize someone important is missing from all the important events in your
family's life.

Normal is trying to decide what to take to the cemetery for Birthdays, X-mas, Thanksgiving, New Years, Valentine's Day, July 4th.

Normal is feeling like you can't sit another minute without getting up and
screaming, because you just don't like to sit through anything anymore.

Normal is not sleeping very well because a thousand what if's & why didn't I's go through your head constantly.

Normal is reliving the accident continuously through your eyes and mind, holding your head to make it go away.

Normal is having the TV on the minute you walk into the house to have noise, because the silence is deafening.

Normal is staring at every boy who looks like he is my sons age. And then thinking of the age he'd would be now. Then wondering why it is even important to imagine it, because it will never happen.

Normal is every happy event in your life always being backed up with
sadness lurking close behind, because of the hole in your heart.

Normal is telling the story of your child's death as if it were
an everyday, commonplace activity, and then seeing the horror in
someone's eyes at how awful it sounds. And yet realizing it has
become a part of your "normal."

Normal is each year coming up with the difficult task of how to honor your childs's memory and their birthdays and survive these days. And trying to find the balloon or flag that fit's the occasion. Happy Birthday? Not really.

Normal is my heart warming and yet sinking at the sight of something special he would have loved. Thinking how he would love it, but how he is not here to enjoy it.

Normal is having some people afraid to mention my son. Normal is making sure that others remember him.

Normal is after the funeral is over everyone else goes on with their lives, but we continue to grieve our loss forever.

Normal is weeks, months, and years after the initial shock, the grieving gets worse, not better.

Normal is not
listening to people compare anything in their life to this loss, unless they too have lost a child. Nothing compares.

NOTHING.

Even if your child is in the remotest part of the earth away from you - it doesn't compare.

Losing a parent is horrible, but having to bury your own child is unnatural.

Normal is taking pills, and trying not to cry all day, because you know your mental health depends on it.

Normal is realizing you do cry everyday.

Normal is being impatient with everything and everyone but someone stricken with grief over the loss of their child.

Normal is sitting at the computer
crying, sharing how you feel with chat buddies who have also lost a child.

Normal is not
listening to people make excuses for G-d.
"G-d may have done this becauseů"

I would like to believe that my son is in "heaven," but hearing people trying to think up excuses as to why a fantastic young man was taken from this earth is not appreciated and makes absolutely no sense to this grieving mother.

Normal is being too tired to care if you paid the bills, cleaned the house, did the laundry or if there is any food.

Normal is wondering this time whether you are going to say you have two children or one child, because you will never see this person again and it is not worth explaining that my son is dead.
And yet when you say you have one child to
avoid that problem, you feel horrible as if you have betrayed the dead child.

Normal is asking G-d why he took your child's life instead of yours and asking if there even is a G-d.

Normal is knowing you will never get over this loss, not in a day nor a million years.

Normal is having therapists agree with you that you will never "really" get over the pain and that there is nothing they can do to help you because they know only bringing back your child back from the dead could possibly make it "better."

Normal is
learning to lie to everyone you meet and telling them you are fine. You lie because it makes others uncomfortable if you cry. You've learned it's easier to lie to them then to tell them the truth that you still feel empty and it's probably never going to get any better -- ever.

And last of all...

Normal is hiding all the things that have become "normal" for you to
feel, so that everyone around you will think that you are "normal."

 

My Teddy Bear
imikimi - Customize Your World!

 

A Family Chain Is Broken
imikimi - Customize Your World!

 

I LOVE YOU
imikimi - Customize Your World!

 

in loving memory,,,son daughter,MY LITTLE ANGELS
imikimi - Customize Your World!

 

My sweet family
imikimi - Customize Your World!

 

pooh with friends
imikimi - Customize Your World!

 

r.i.p.
imikimi - Customize Your World!

 

in memory
imikimi - Customize Your World!

 

R.i.P
imikimi - Customize Your World!

 

 

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